Old Signs

Sweetie, I'm half wishing you are dying.

'Cus then you'll love me like I love you.
And I wish you won't cry over me.
Because It's better if you never love me.
Because then I'm just a coward.
Then I'm just selfish.
Then I'm just attention seeking.
Gone too far. Bad habits.
Because then I did it for the wrong reasons.
Then it's not your fault.

I don't want you to blame yourself,
Even though you ruined me,

Ruined my progress,
Ruined my sanity,
Shattered my heart.
Because a bottle of bud is worth more than my life.

I wish it wasn't like this.
But it's all your fault.